July is a big birthday month in our household. Not only is three fourths of our immediate family July babies, we get to celebrate lots of family and friends too. One of those birthdays belongs to my brother-in-law, Aaron. If you’ve had the pleasure of meeting Aaron, he has undoubtedly made an impression. Whether he greeted you with a kiss on the mouth, gave you a unique nickname or taught you a new catch phrase, he’s hard to forget. One of the many things I love about Aaron is that he always has a different figure of speech to use in conversations. They seem go in and out of rotation, some are more appropriate than others, but they’re always memorable. One of his latest mantras, and one of my favorites, is “adapt and overcome.”
A couple years ago, I was at my nephew’s state cross country meet and then headed to a girls weekend with my mom and sisters. Before I could make it out of Jeff City, my car died a couple times. It was leaking oil and causing problems, and Aaron discovered my dilemma before he headed out of town. He met us at a gas station and kept repeating, “adapt and overcome.” Without hesitation, he sprang into action, grabbing a funnel and a couple quarts of oil off the shelf and refusing to even let me pay for it at the register. In no time, he had my oil topped off and my sister and I back on the road.
Adapt and overcome is a fairly simple phrase, but Aaron’s can-do attitude made an impression on me. He wasn’t annoyed or stressed out from our minor inconvenience, which likely pales in comparison to the major issues he deals with on a regular basis at his job. But I thought “adapt and overcome” would be a good mantra to add into my own personal repertoire. In our day to day lives, there are so many times we need to adapt. To me, it’s a good reminder to keep doing things, taking an active role in our lives instead of just saying no and missing out. We may not always be able to participate in the same way as everyone else in all this wonderful world has to offer, but usually with a little extra effort, we can at least participate in some way.
One example of this was at a former family birthday celebration, not in July, but hosted by Aaron and my sister Lee for their awesome daughter Brynn. As you might imagine, Aaron’s big personality makes him a pretty great party host. The year Brynn turned 5, they rented out an entire rolling skating rink for her party and let the kids live it up! As much as I would have loved for Gage to strap on a pair of skates and go to town like the rest of the little ones, that wasn’t an option. But Lee and Aaron still made sure we knew we were welcome at the party. And Gage still got to “adapt and overcome” and get out on the floor in his Mustang gait trainer! He had a great time along with all the other kiddos and the beautiful birthday girl.
Another way we’ve figured out how to adapt and overcome is with travel. When Gage celebrated his first birthday, we started a tradition of doing birthday trips every other year. We save the parties for even years. This year’s trip was a beach vacation in Florida! It didn’t fall on any of our actual birthdays, but I’m still counting it. Knowing our kids would not tolerate the long car ride, we opted for a flight down there. Flying with kids comes with its fair share of adaptations. Although I was nervous about potential damage to his wheelchair, we gate checked it both ways and it actually came in really handy for packing all the stuff we had to lug through the airport. Another necessary adaptation is a car seat for Gage to sit in on the plane since he’s required to be in his own seat for takeoff and landing. I dreaded hauling it through security and to our gate, but with a spot for it to ride along on his chair, it wasn’t a big deal at all.
While in Florida, we took the boys to the beach for the first time! I was probably the most excited of anyone about this, but it really was magical. It came along with its own adaptations too. Sandy beaches aren’t exactly wheelchair friendly, so we did a lot of carrying to get all of our gear to a spot by the water. We even loaded Caleb down with a backpack. But the giggles from Gage when the rolling waves washed over his toes made all the effort worth it.
Birthday parties and beach trips are just a couple of ways we “adapt and overcome.” But I realize it’s not always quite that simple. Sometimes as much as you want to overcome an extra challenge, you’re not always able to find a fix. Adapt and overcome may sound like a big, grand gesture, but I realize the way we’re going things isn’t solving all the world’s problems. I’m not claiming to be a supermom and I certainly realize that we don’t have it all figured out. As Gage (and his equipment) continue to grow, simple adaptations may get harder and harder. There are times that we’ll likely have to just say no to some things, and that’s ok. But for now, in the ways we can actively take part in our lives, we will keep making every effort to adapt and overcome. I have a feeling it will be worth it.